


Large Expectations

by Soulmated



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Bottom Merlin, Boyfriends, Established Relationship, Fear, M/M, Penis Size, Size Kink, Top Arthur
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-16
Updated: 2014-03-16
Packaged: 2018-01-15 23:24:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1323151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soulmated/pseuds/Soulmated
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Years of bad experiences have told Arthur that big isn’t always better. Can Merlin prove him wrong?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Large Expectations

**Author's Note:**

> I dreamed this believe it or not. xx

“He’s starting to get impatient,” Arthur moaned dejectedly over a pint of ale, desperately trying to ignore the pub chatter around him.

His problem was delicate, but his desperation overruled his embarrassment at having this conversation in such a public place. 

“Who is?” Lancelot politely shoved his way through the crowd until reaching the corner table, too gentlemanly to simply tell another patron to shove over.  He breathed a sigh of relief when he neatly placed the pint glasses on the small corner table, mentally pleased it wouldn’t be his round for a good hour.

_Camelot_ was packed. It was hardly surprising considering it was a Friday night.

“Merlin of course!” Gwaine snorted as he snatched his drink, downing half of it in one go. “Ah…the poor lads gotta be suffering from a huge case of blue balls at this rate.”

Arthur groaned. “He’s going to leave me.”

“He isn’t going to leave you, Arthur” Lancelot tried to sooth his best mates nerves. “Merlin isn’t like that.”

That didn’t stop Arthur from face planting the table, struggling to hold back tears at the thought of Merlin leaving him once he found out what Arthur had been trying to prevent from happening all those past months. He adored Merlin, far more than any of his previous romances, and look how they all turned up.

Take your pick.

He didn’t want to scare Merlin off. Why he continued to torture himself by putting off the inevitable he didn’t know. He cared for the big eared bloke too much to simply give him up.

No, if things were going to end then Merlin would be the one to leave, not Arthur.

“Have you thought about just telling him?” Gwaine tried. “I know Merlin’s never one to dish out details on his past relationships, but I doubt he’ll mind mate.”

Arthur grunted. “I seem to remember you shouting something like _holy cow, how are you even able to walk let alone fuck with that thing_ if I remember correctly. Doesn’t fill me with the widest of confidence that Merlin isn’t going to see it and run.”

Gwaine actually winced at the reminder. “Well, uh…”he coughed in an attempt to clear his throat. “I admit it wasn’t the most brilliant thing I could have come out with, but it really isn’t that big of a deal, Arthur.”

He stared back blankly. They both knew what a load of bullshit that was. People cared, especially that of the male variety.

“Fuck off!” he grunted into his drink. Lancelot, always the voice of reason, was surprisingly quiet. “Don’t tell me you don’t have any advice for me, you _always_ have something good to say!”

Lancelot shrugged. “I still don’t think Merlin will leave you over it. He’s a good lad, Gwen adores him and even that step-sister of yours finds him adorable and you know how rare that is. I would be surprised if Uther didn’t approve, after coming to terms with it of course. If Merlin’s stuck around this long without getting any, I doubt he’d leave once you’ve dropped pants.”

Arthur sneered. “You are _not_ helping.”

Lancelot shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know what else to say, Arthur. It’s been nine months, even longer since you’ve even been naked in front of a guy you hold any interest in, so I honestly think you are pushing this way out of proportion.”

Was he?

Arthur knew his problem wouldn’t seem as horrifying to the majority of men out there, but they hadn’t _lived_ with it. His cock seemed to rule his every thought, and not in a good way. At least men with small dicks didn’t have to see the look of fear and horror when their partner saw them naked for the first time.

It had happened each and every time.

It was truly horrid.

He had shamefully only been fucked once, his teenage boyfriend at the time having straight out told him there was no way in hell it was going to be happening the other way round and if Arthur wasn’t willing to take it then they were as good as over.

It also hadn’t been the most romantic of interactions. The boy he thought he was nearly in love with making snide comments without even considering the impact it might have on him.

Valiant was an arse and the entire encounter had left him heartbroken and ashamed. 

It wasn’t as if he could simply bed a woman either. He was a 100% gay. Tits and pussy did absolutely nothing for him so that meant Qwaine’s only seemingly realistic advice was a load of bullshit. How was he meant to fuck a vagina if even the sight of them made his stomach clench, and not in a good way?

Why did Merlin have to be so bloody perfect?

He had given up on the idea of love a long time ago, but then Merlin had to come crashing into his life all big eared and perfect. He hadn’t been able to resist. He adored Merlin, but whenever it came to moving past heated snogs and chest gropes he told Merlin _no._

He knew while Merlin said he was ok with waiting that it was starting to take its toll. Every time they touched his boyfriend was hesitant, worried about overstepping any bounds and he hated it. Arthur hated that his boyfriend didn’t feel comfortable enough to touch him and it was his fault.

It made him hate himself more than he already did.

Those who said having a big dick was brilliant were full of a load of shit. He would do just about anything to have an average sized cock rather than what he was stuck with.

It created a hell of a lot more tension than it did pleasure.

“Maybe you should just say _fuck it_ and show him, Arthur” Gwaine licked his lips. “If he wants to break up with you, at least you know he isn’t your soul mate.”

Arthur smiled fondly at that. Merlin wasn’t religious by far, but he was a firm believer in both karma and soul mates, ranting off ideas of destiny and that they are all but two sides of the same coin.

His boyfriend was such a dope, Arthur thought fondly.

* * *

 

Arthur was sitting nervously on the edge of his couch when he heard the intercom buzz. Licking nervously at his lips he quickly let Merlin through, not wanting to draw things out when it was about to go one or two ways tonight.

Merlin would leave him.

…or…

Merlin would see it, not be horrified, and somehow they could try and make it work. Unlikely, but he needed some motivation to actually have the balls to follow through with his plan for the evening.

“Arthur?” was it him or did Merlin sound almost nervous. “You here? I mean, of course you’re here, you buzzed me through ‘nd all and you couldn’t have done that if you weren’t here so…”

Smiling despite his nerves at his boyfriends familiar ramblings, Arthur ran a hand through his hair before staring at the tall beauty that was his hopefully soon to be lover.

“You said we needed to talk…” Merlin sounded nervous. “I mean, is this you breaking up with me? Because I knew it was coming, I mean how…why…uh, would you choose me of all people, and I know you probably tried to make it work-“

“Merlin!” Arthur cut him off in shock. “What the fuck are you rambling on about this time?” did he really just hear what he thought he did?

Shifting awkwardly on the balls of his feet Merlin shrugged. “You…uh…come one, don’t make me say it, Arthur.” He sounded crushed, and just about looked it as well. “If you’re going to dump me can you just hurry up and do it, _please_?”

He sounded so pitiful, those puppy eyes doing strange things to Arthurs heart. Striding forward Arthur grabbed his stupidly foolish boyfriend by the shoulders and pulled him in for a tongue deep kiss.

“Mm…”

Pulling away after his attempt – and successful attempt at that – to make Merlin breathless, Arthur raised a brow. “What’s this about me apparently breaking up with you?”

Already flushed from the kiss Merlin’s previously pale cheeks flushed deeper in their red. “Uh…”

“Tell me.”

Merlin stiffened before sighing. “At first I thought everything was going great, but then when it comes to me touching you…uh…you don’t like it. I figured you were nervous, I mean I was so I didn’t hold it against you, but then the months kept passing and you kept refusing my affections so I thought you just wanted to be friends, but you didn’t stop kissing me so I was confused. Then you seemed relieved when I stopped my attempts to get intimate and it hurt, and I thought you were going to break up with me, so I guess I figured when you called me over sounding all evasive this was the moment you told me to sling my hook.”

Arthur stared at a suddenly breathless and ashamed Merlin. It didn’t suit him one bit. He was very much aware that he hadn’t been the most attentive boyfriend in the world, but it had never crossed his mind that Merlin thought _he_ was the problem, that Arthur wasn’t attracted to him like that and then to ludicrously draw to the conclusion that Arthur was the one wanting out….

“Stupid fool,” he spoke affectionately as he brushed a stray curl away from his boyfriends face. “I love you, you idiot.”

Merlin sighed. “I know; which is why I don’t get why you don’t want me to touch you or you to touch me.”  

That was a never the issue, him touching Merlin, but when he thought about it he realised that he hadn’t, not really. He would rub Merlin through his jeans, just never finish him off. Merlin was _touchy_ when it came to being intimate, Arthur had always pulled away when Merlin got to the point where he couldn’t control himself, nor his hands, anymore.

He sighed. He was such an arse.

“What’s wrong, Arthur?”

Merlin sounded so desperate, so confused that it broke Arthurs heart. He had never been one for emotions until the dope entered his life, and he was still left wondering whether it was a good thing or not.

“I have a big cock.”

There, he said it.

“Are you taking the piss?” Merlin demanded suddenly, pulling away. “What the fuck, Arthur?”

_What_? It wasn’t until Arthur saw how pissed Merlin was he rethought what he had said, flushing when he realised that his comment had come across as bragging, a cop-out, rather than his intention.

He sighed. “I’ve…I’ve never met anyone that hasn’t had an issue with it.”

His confession was met with silence, it being obvious that Merlin didn’t have the slightest idea on how to respond. Arthur didn’t blame him, especially when the stupid fool thought he had called him over to break up with him.

As if that was ever going to be happening.

“Let me get this straight,” Merlin’s nose twitched. “Your cock is apparently so big that people are _scared_ of you?” his voice was flustered, obviously trying to lighten the tension with a joke.

Arthur wasn’t laughing. “Yes.”

“Alright,” Merlin sat on the sofa Arthur had vacated. “Show me,” he asked simply.

“Wh-what?” Arthur stuttered, flustered. He was sure if it had been any other situation he would have felt his cock flood with blood at his dominant tone, yet he was too terrified of Merlin’s reaction to feel any sort of arousal. “Merlin-“

“Show me.”

Clenching his eyes shut he remembered why he had had invited Merlin over in the first place. It was too late to chicken out now, especially after confessing the true reason why he wasn’t so eager with the intimacy aspect of their relationship.

“Can you-can you look away for a sec?”

Merlin raised a brow but nodded, tilting his body around as to give Arthur some resemblance of privacy. Arthur sighed, reaching to unbutton his shirt with shaking fingers.

He wanted to die of humiliation.

Shredding himself of his shirt Arthur kicked off his shoes and socks before hesitating when it came to his jeans. Did he really want to go through with this? Risk being humiliated even more so than he already was?

One look at Merlin gave him the answer he was looking for.

Feeling the ridge of his cock brush against his inner thigh as he bent down to remove his jeans Arthur sighed. Even if Merlin was disgusted with his body, surely his boyfriend wouldn’t outwardly show any signs of disgust, right?

Ugh!

“Please don’t made fun of me, Merlin” was his pathetic hint that Merlin could turn around. He still had his boxers on, but the bulge underneath the material was unmistakable. He was only slightly hard, but it was enough.

Turning, Arthur clenched his eyes shut as he felt Merlin’s raking over his form, not wanting to see his reaction as he waited tensely for Merlin to make the next move. He missed the way his boyfriends eyes hungrily raked over his defined chest, the way his loving boyfriend paused at the slight bulge in his boxers with a wide eyed gaze that left his breathless.

_Fuck…_

“Can-can you t-take them off?” Merlin pleaded.

Figuring if Merlin was still with him he hadn’t been immediately put off, Arthur quickly shoved his boxers down his legs, cringing at the sensation of his heavy cock hanging between his legs. He barely resisted the urge to clench his legs in disgust.

Merlin was silent as Arthur stood there, the only sound being their combined breathing. Minutes must have passed before Arthur couldn’t take it anymore, opening his eyes only to see Merlin still staring directly at his cock.

Opening his mouth, preparing to yell at Merlin to leave if he was that turned off, when he looked at his boyfriend of nine months, _really_ looked. Instead of the disgust he had expected to see, Merlin looked… _flustered._

“Merlin?” he asked hesitantly, trying to ignore the fact he was naked.

“Fuck, Arthur” Merlin fumbled with his works. “ _Fuck.”_

Was-was Merlin turned on? Did he dare even begin to hope?

“Christ Arthur…how…how could you think I would turn you away?” Merlin looked at him, dark eyed and flushed cheeks. “Do you really think that low of me?”

“No! No of course not!” Arthur scrubbed his face roughly with his hands, trying to ignore the fact he was still naked and partly hard. “I just…” he couldn’t continue, what was he meant to say? That seeing the look of fear on his partner was a turn on, because it wasn’t by far. It made him feel like a monster and he _hated_ it.

He wasn’t a bad person, sometimes a prat as Merlin called him, but not a monster.

“I didn’t want to scare you off as well,” he finally answered pathetically. “Definitely not you.”

Clenching his eyes shut, hands curled into fists resting by his side, Arthur tried not to cry. He hated feeling so weak, so out of his element, and Merlin was seeing him at his most vulnerable.

It made him feel weak, the one thing his father had taught him was never to be in a position where weakness was a possibility.

Then again, if he had listened to his father he wouldn’t be with Merlin right at that moment.

He jumped when he felt familiar fingers brushing against his cheek bone. “I’m not scared of you, Arthur” Merlin spoke softly, gently as if soothing a skittish horse. Arthur couldn’t bring himself to complain at the feather like touch. “I adore you. You having…uh…a deliciously large dick is not going to be changing the way I feel about you, you know that right?”

Still hung up on the word _delicious_ Arthur couldn’t bring himself to answer his boyfriend as he snapped his eyes open, expecting to see Merlin staring in his eyes only to see dark eyes trained further south.

“Did you just refer to my dick as delicious?” he asked shocked.

Merlin flushed. “Maybe,” he spoke shyly. “Have a problem with that?”

Pleased with his answer, Arthur was filled with such a burst of affection he couldn’t help but sweep Merlin up into a tight hug. “God I love you,” he murmured. “So fucking perfect!”

“Does that mean we can have sex now? Or at least some heavy petting?” Arthur heard Merlin mumble against his chest. He laughed, but even so couldn’t help but feel his bare cock rapidly fill with blood where it rested against the rough fabric of Merlin’s jeans.

“You could get naked for me first,” he suggested, both eager to see Merlin in all his naked glory as well as get rid of the vulnerability he felt at his own nakedness while his soon to be lover was still fully clothed.

“Thank god,” Merlin breathed before rapidly pulling off his clothes.

“Fuck.”

Soft, pale skin was quickly revealed to Arthur’s eager eyes as his boyfriend stripped down for the first time in nine months, a slight splattering of dark chest hair contrasting rapidly against the whiteness of his skin. Physically they were exact opposites, but Arthur – while he would never admit it aloud – was very much like Merlin in his beliefs that they were fated together.

He simply wasn’t as open about it. Merlin on the other hand had no same.

“You like what you see?”

Arthur managed a “fuck yea” before tackling his cheeky boyfriend onto the bed. “Gunna suck your cock,” he murmured before eagerly making his way down Merlin’s chest, chuckling low in his throat as his lover squealed after catching Merlin’s nipple with his tongue.

His boyfriend was _sensitive._  

It didn’t take long before Merlin was at the point of near cumming, his hips bucking wildly against Arthur’s grip. It wasn’t until he heard Merlin’s _“gunna cum, fuck, please, gunna…”_ that he pulled away, smiling brightly at Merlin’s loud keening.

“Arthur! What the fuck!” he propped himself up on his elbows. “I was fucking close!”

“I thought you wanted sex.”

While Arthur knew he sounded confident, inside panic was clawing at his chest at the thought of a number of different possible outcomes. Merlin could change his mind, he could leave him, leave Arthur, but what he was worried about the most was causing any pain to his lover, to his soul mate.

He wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if any harm had come to Merlin by his own hand, let alone whether it had been an accident or not.

Clearly he hadn’t done a good enough job at hiding his emotions if Merlin’s soft smile was anything to go by as he moved to gently cup his cheek. “You won’t hurt me.”

Arthur swallowed. “So…how do you want to do this?”

Flushing in pleasure Arthur took great delight in watching the pure unadulterated desire appear on Merlin’s face, the next few minutes a blurr as Arthur took great pleasure in helping Merlin prepare himself before he found himself flat on his back with his lover straddling his thighs.

“I’m gunna ride you,” Merlin grinned broader, flushed and already panting. “I’ve…uh…clearly haven’t had anyone as big as you…I mean Will wasn’t small, but…yea” he stuttered. Arthur frowned at the mention of the only other bloke Merlin had been with, but felt a sick satisfaction that Merlin was clearly eager to sit on his cock. “You just, uh, lie there and I’ll do the work, yea?”

Speechless, Arthur nodded.

The first sensation of the blunt head of his cock pressing against the tight heat of Merlin’s arse was almost too much. He had never been one to enjoy getting fucked in the arse, then again the experience had never been pleasant and he had every prediction that it would be a completely different sensation with Merlin, but still. Merlin was the expert, the one with the experience in this situation, so if Arthur had to lay down and let Merlin do whatever he wished, he would do so gladly.

It wasn’t as if he didn’t think it wouldn’t be mind-blowing.

“Fuck!”

Merlin looked enchanting as he ever so slowly began to lower himself onto Arthurs straining cock. He knew it wasn’t just the length that Merlin was taking, but also the thickness of the meaty length.

“Shit! Oh my _…uhhhh_ ”

Fuck, had he hit his prostate already?

Sweat was pouring down both of their foreheads, Merlins fingers scrambling against Arthur’s chest as he rose off his cock slightly before lowering himself once again, taking a little more every time the action was repeated.

Arthur was both pleased and shocked to find that Merlin’s cock hadn’t wilted in the slightest, yet was an angry red as it bounced against his stomach with every thrust.

“ _Fucking hell!”_

_“Bollacks!”_

_“Uhhh….”_

Struggling to hold off, Arthur felt his entire body seize up when Merlin had bottomed out, his entire cock stuffed in his boyfriends tight arse.

It was…indescribable.

And short.

As soon as he felt the tight heat of his boyfriends arsehole grip his entire length he was gone, thrusting up before he could stop himself as he came with a loud shout of _“Merlin”_ before he was shooting his load into his lovers arse, trembling and almost blacking out with the sheer pleasure of it.

He had never felt anything like it before.

“Fuck, sorry” he whimpered, mortified that he had finally gotten the opportunity to be so intimate with Merlin and he had fucking cum like a teenager. “I-“

“It’s fine,” Merlin panted, still slowly circling his lips. His head was thrown back and it was clear he was struggling to even pay attention to what Arthur was saying. “Just…fuck, just _touch me_!” he whined.

Without hesitation Arthur quickly began jerking his cock, shifting his hips in slow and shallow movements as Merlin groaned and withered on top of him. He was still hard, and while his cock was overly sensitive he found it hard to care when the alternative was to make Merlin come just as hard as he had.

“Christ Merlin…so sexy, swallowing up my cock-“ was all he managed to stumble out before Merlin was cuming, practically screeching as his cock pulsed and squirted onto his stomach in short multiple bursts.

“God I fucking love you,” Arthur breathed as they curled around each other. He knew he must have been a mother hen after Merlin had hissed slightly after letting the cock slip out of him,  but  Merlin had simply battered him away, saying even with a regular sized cock there was bound to be some soreness, that he liked it.

Merlin giggled against his side. “I love you too, Arthur, big cock ‘nd all.”  


End file.
